Thursday, February 28, 2008

55 Words and a Cricket Story

“Whew – Anderson’s bowling at 95 today”, Yuvraj said.
“But his shoulder has not yet recovered. So, he can’t keep at that pace”, Mahi replied.
“Yeah. If he’s kept at bay for this one session, batting out the day will not be a problem.”
“One billion people are praying for that!”
“Play’s been called. Good luck.”

“Do you think they will rework the clauses?”, Vikram asked.
“They must. Otherwise, the morale will just collapse”, said Tariq.
“Who will speak with Mr Bajoria?”
“I will. Maybe we should ask Andy to take a look at the contract.”
“Wonder if he is familiar with the legalities?”
“He would be. Let’s call him tonight.”

“Hey Mahi – that was a GOOD over, wasn’t it?”
“Christmas in May! His shoulder is tanking, I think.”
“Yeah, four boundaries in one over… enough to blow his confidence away!”
“They might just bring on Plunkett now for variety’s sake...”
“I hope so. All that net practice lifting the ball will come to some use!”

“Who’s shooting your next ad film?”
“That fellow – what’s his name – Prakash Tambe.”
“He’s crap, yaar. Too full of himself. Hardly thinks of the model.”
“Yeah, but his use of graphics is very good. Since it’s a new car, I think a little jazz is required.”
“Be sure to approve the script beforehand.”
“Oh – absolutely!”

“How many times has this Plunkett jerk taken five wickets in an innings?”
“Many more than he deserves.”
“Three are against Bangladesh.”
“Bloody fool keeps three slips, a gully and then bowls outside leg.”
“Maybe the third boundary was too much. Smith will take him off now.”
“That’s true. How many to avoid follow on?”

“Have you seen Harpreet in the new cola ad?”
“Complete bakwaas. How can they get a cricketer to dance with cartoons?”
“If they had to spend so much on graphics, they needn’t have spent two crores on him!”
“Happy is charging two crores?”
“Yeah boss – what do you expect after two hat-tricks in a row?”

“What is the win percentage of teams batting fourth here?”
“Close to zero. The cracks will start appearing on Day Four.”
“This was a bad toss to lose.”
“On this surface, Harpreet and Neelesh can turn a ping-pong ball on Day Five.”
“But since Graham is their only spinner, we can still pull it off.”

“Did you notice the hostess at last night’s party?”
“Notice? I have her phone number. She’s staying in the hotel itself.”
“Balls! You as well?”
“Boss, the horny bitch was passing her card to everybody.”
“She’s from the event company. Has flown in from Bombay.”
“Won’t have time for her this week, for sure!”

“If Prakash and Raman had stayed for an hour, this is a dream pitch to bat on.”
“Yaar, Prakash’s footwork is missing for the third series now.”
“I think Gordon will have to work on him separately after the series ends.”
“Gordon is willing but Prakash will have no time. No hope of individual sessions.”

Each paragraph alternates between two sets of guys. Two are batting in a Test. The other two are in office, following the match. The question is, which is which?
The intended point on cricketers’ commitment and spectators’ passion gets slightly diluted by the whole sledging controversy!
And each paragraph (including this) is 55 words long.

6 comments:

nilendu said...

This beats just about every other blog post I have read out there. "Unputdownable".

Micheal Madhusudan "Amitrakhhor chhonde" e boi likhechilo, aar tarpore tui ei "Umar Pachpan ki, dil bachpan ka" banali.

Tina o eta niye likhle maybe title hoto "Mr and Mrs 55".

However, remember that 5 55-word post went up in smoke.

Nilendu

nilendu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
udayan said...

Quite cool.

But who is this Smith, England captain?

Kakali said...

Brilliant!
Cannot say so about your previous post, though :)

OrangeJammies said...

You have clearly been influenced by a greater power, O Chaudhuri! Hmmm.. now whose 55s have you been reading? Trust you to connect it to cricket, though. Why not Bollywood? Sauteli maa treatment to your favorite subject??? Nahiiiiiiin! Just FYI: if you're ever bored, you only have to count the number of words in here.

Rimi said...

WILL YOU POST ALREADY???